Dual....:-)
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
