Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
