i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
