All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I wish I only lived at night.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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