For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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