i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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