the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Randomize