i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
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