He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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