I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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