New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
