hotel room ftw
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize