He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
hell yes lets make some ravioli
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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