Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
