Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
