It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize