I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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