I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
