I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
