my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
