My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
