You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
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I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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