so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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