I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
