ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
