The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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