i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
