im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
