Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I need water and some morals
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
