Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
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