you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize