I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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