K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
