STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
