So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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