we made out on top of his cat.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
