it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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