You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
