I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
