ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
