Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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