just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
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