Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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