Sponge bath it is.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
