going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Randomize
