it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
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Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
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I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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