we have officially mastered the walk of shame
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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