I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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