He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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