hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
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