I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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